You deserve yourself a blunt and a build a bear.
Semi hypothetical question. Do you think its physically possible to bruise your clit?
One person in the car. Three blizzards. Alot of judging.
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
I know, but I was really high and I felt like a failure dragon because I could only blow smoke, no fire.
There's a knife in my toilet. And I meant to ask you last night if you got a hair cut?
Im thinking about quitting weed for my dog
Some poor guy found you passed out in a bathroom stall. Again with your dick out. Looks like you got to rage after all.
Everyone is speaking Spanish and this 300 hundred pound chick is talking about the time she got out of prison... Fuck this place
I sliced my fucking arm open last night after margarita madness and had to drive myself to the ER. Got six stitches and a social worker came in and asked if I was abused due to my sex bruises. I literally had to tell her "don't worry, I like it rough"
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
I am literally sitting here with a jar of Nutella and a spoon, reading an article called "never drink alone again because now there's wine for cats." How single am I?
I want to get a list going called "D list celebs I've kissed"
It's not even 8pm on a Friday and I've already got a guy to tell me how big his penis is. Watched anything good on Netflix lately?
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