You work out of a Hotel?
Just saw an Asian guy riding his razor scooter to class. Dreams do come true
I just got a standing ovation when i made it to work on New Years Day. good thing?
If your pregnant with his baby maybe we can start getting weed for free.
I just masterbated while imagining him getting hit by a truck. I have hit a completely unacceptable level of anger & bitterness. Help.
i was about to cum until he started doing shrek impressions.
Can you give me a hickey quick? Im going to a white trash themed party. Completely serious
If you asked me 10 years ago where I thought I'd be today, I can pretty much guarantee I wouldn't have replied with "buying hemorrhoid cream on Bourbon St at 7am"
I make one hell of a fire on Ambien. Other life choices not so much. But fire. Fire I can do.
True idk how my parents didn't know I was blackout. I ate like 4 pieces of cheesecake and showed my cousins my boobs
This summer has already been like the best summer ever. FREEDOM IS AWESOME. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND GOD BLESS THE SINGLE LIFE.
I'm just waking up. I awoke in a towel (I must have showered at some point),i also found a half eaten McChicken in my bed and vomit in the toilet. Seems like I'm winning at life
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
What do you mean you haven’t had the fantasy of getting anally penetrated by a tentacle monster?
My brain is like a TV with 10 channels, 9 of them are static and the other one just plays that one Nagito Komaeda edit on loop 24/7
Randomize
