Lesson 1: you can't keep macking on a girl if you get handcuffed
It wasn't until i was on my knees with three dicks in my face that i thought it might be a bad idea
i just added your friend Valery on the FB just to comment on your tits.... thought id give you a heads up
Just had a memory of you pretending to be a begging dog putting your head on my lap while I fed you. Great night to try a new drug.
Just drove past the dude that came in your sock
She just hopped out of the car at a red light to pet the baby Jesus in the nativity scene.
Not worth it.
You'd be surprised at the stuff my vagina tells my brain to say
She kicked in my bedroom door in only high-heals with a bottle of wine, announcing it was "cock-o-clock"
im in the post action - pre consequence stage.
You're a five foot adderall and caffeine fueled ball of sexual frustration and suppressed rage. It's only a matter of time before you snap. We're taking bets on when.
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
You know more about his cock specs than his childhood. Proud of you
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
I guess I'm famous. Hot lesbian was WARNED about me. Still hooked up with her.
I'll pay you to teach me.
Your Saturday night was spent at the opera, mine was spent exchanging naked pics with a hot middle aged man that is so ripped that he looks like he's photoshopped. This is why we're blood sisters. We balance each other out.
I hate you so hard.
Randomize
