he ate out my asshole, i really don't think he gets embarrassed easily.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
Some guy is walking around the bar with his dick out. Health code violation?
You just seemed really offended whenever my cup was empty.
Are you doing trivia tonite? Also sorry I peed on you.
We're going to party like we don't have spanx on
Hold on - sidebar. My best friend just threw a 40 pack of condoms through my window.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
They are like untrained puppies reaking havoc on a newly furnished house. Out of control.
You just compared our vaginas to a newly furnished house...I can dig it.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
We told him to puke in the Denny's parking lot or we wouldn't be his friend anymore. So he did. He wasn't even drunk.
My "birthday sex" consisted of approximately 25 seconds of him going down on me in the shower.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
Is there a subtle way to tell him he needs to hydrate? 8 years of yoga and kegels. He has no idea what I’m going to do to him this weekend
Randomize
