so, just learned that EVERYONE heard pretty much everything last night. my roommates were surprised to learn you're a dirty talker.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
any interest in drunk sledding later? if not, any interest in driving me to the hospital later?
I mean it's my life so what if i want to drink Molson from my sparkly shoes and not regret anything
Let me shower first- i smell like sex and rock climbing (not so sure how that happened)
Fuck a-yeah! I just found a wine key. Let 'Don't Fuck With Me Friday' commence.
This is America. Thomas Jefferson would have said I want some vagina.
Do you know what the cost code is for strip clubs? I'm filling out my company expense report right now
I told her the only thing I had going for me was my huge cock. She said she was willing to overlook my other shortcomings.
I can't even express how horny I am. The English language isn't equipped for what I'm plotting.
On the food pyramid big dick are "sometimes foods"
do me a favor, I need this weekend off so can you work your magic and blow my boss again?
I got a snap of someone jumping off a light pole. Was that you? Please confirm or deny. #onWisconsin
Dude I woke up with a handprint shaped bruise on my ass, a pong ball in my cleavage, and somebody else's gold chain around my neck. Who's house am I in?
After 25 beers and 3 shots my best friend thought it would be an amazing idea to get his dick pierced. We are on our way.
Randomize