Shitting during a conference call is so empowering.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
found a pic of my little bro & his girl naked. he got the brains and the huge junk gene. I hate him
You're just mad at the fact that I want to be a car alarm.
we were both as far on opposite edges of my bed as possible this morning. id say work is gonna be a little uncomfortable from now on
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
our conversations pretty much only consist of the phrase 'fuck you'. and the sex is fantastic. we've got a great thing going here.
My kindergarten teacher served me... All coming full circle
That dick who always called me a slut in high school showed up at the clinic with boner problems. Then I was assigned as his nurse. Who's laughing now. I AM.
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Indoor beer darts at Rafs just turned into a trust exercise of putting your hand on the wall and closing your eyes while the other throws.. Almost gave Cale a Tracheotomy
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
Some guy just drank alcohol from me shoe..I think he's had enough..
try to milk me bitch
Pretty sure my aunt hooked up with one of my brothers frat brothers at his graduation party
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