Screwed.edu
Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
We just got really drunk and bought toilet paper. Successful Monday.
You didn't have enough money so you tried to convince the cashier that "four dollar foot long" rolled off the tongue better. Stop drinking. Immediately.
I know it's pride week, but your asshole is just never supposed to taste like banana.
ps if your frozen peas taste like crotch it's because some dude kicked me in the nuts while trying to do a keg stand and I needed an ice pack
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
I feel bad for his balls. Ive never seen so much sperm. He had to be dying
Jesus himself couldn't make a better sandwich
As Scar once said. Be prepared! For the shit show of what's coming tonight
I do NOT want to date a man who has no interest in going to a kangaroo farm
bullshit you weren't drunk, you pointed at me and said my cigarette was empty
I need an outfit that says "thanks for hiring me" but also says "i want dick in my mouth".
I just wanna go home jackoff, eat chicken fingers, drink beer, play halo and go to bed. I'm sick of this shitty school, the shitty kids and having to fucking teach them.
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