I wanna put my baby in that!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Ew you even made it your fb status
Ppl probably think ur having a kid
I hope
Love having children with random chicks
fuck. did you have to draw it on me with a permanent marker
hey just checking if u still hate me for sleeping with your sister?
We need to start having rules for the weekends. Like no more downing 3 shots because we want to slut dance a little harder or because biggie just came on.
i'm pretty sure i'm on the same train we took last friday..
what?how do you know?
it appears they have not cleaned up your vomit yet.
Worst relationship ever. Keep in mind I've dated two married chicks and a Mormon.
I want to apologize in advance in the event I put my boobs in your face
If you bring chipotle to my house i'll let you eat your burrito out of my vagina
My Saturday dick is so much more impressive than my Tuesday dick.
Hahaha it was a great moment in my life. This must be what post child birth feels like, given you don't get a combined asshole/ vagina
He said that he doesn't like skittles. This relationship is over an it hasn't even started yet.
she walked in on me throwing up in the sink with my pants around my ankles and I said "i'll be with you in a sec"
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
Realizing life ain't all about burritos and strippers, it's a struggle out there, and it ain't looking pretty so far,..
Just got a handjob in the hospital
A new low.
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