Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
i feel rough
just turned on the light, there is blood EVERYWHERE.
Can I ask u a weird question?
Sure
do u have the hershy squirts too?
I just remembered before I gave him head I couldn't find a hair tie and he offered to hold my hair up. Maybe we were wrong.. Maybe he does have a heart.
It was odd. His friends dick tasted the same as his. Friends are beginning to have to much in common
I'm still seeing blue. who wrote on my bare nipple?
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Hey Im running from the cops. hiding in a bush. when you're approaching the intersection honk the horn twice and I will come out.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
Shit ive learned: when going out to a party, always wear a bathing suit underneath just in case theres a pool with a roof next to it
Got super judged by this lady at the Rolling Stones concert last night. Bitch don't look so salty at my dad and I splitting two joints, an edible, and two margaritas. It's the stones.
I smell like bonfire and ex-boyfriends
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
Need a Dr's note to excuse me from blowjobs for 3-6 weeks while my jaw heals..
Hell no. Last time I used a Slip N Slide I ended up with bruised ribs, a broken fence and the hatred of a half naked girl with a sprained wrist.
Randomize
