Just got my rental car in Iowa...gas is under 2 dollars in des moines...this is not a real state
btw ... thanks for not giving me up as the craigslist killer
i owe you one
thanks for snagging those panties for me
I was scared of Debbie's boobs today. They were all huge and scary looking
Every time I get scared about the fact that I'm falling for him I remember that he juggles and is hung like a mastadon and everything is a-ok.
I don't know what to tell you, usually I would just ask if they'd like to meet the captain. If you can't get laid it's your problem.
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
I hope it's the birth control, otherwise I'm dying
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
She tried to gratify me left handed. Let's just say I've been placed on the 15 day DL.
If I learned anything from that one time I saw the last 10 minutes of oprah when they talked about the secret, it is that you project what you receive back. I also have wine.
Haha it's harder than you'd think to come up with ways to turn your penis into a Christmas drawing
Also send boobie pics with bobs burgers in background its the only way to get me off anymore
She is 6 months pregnant and gets more action at bars than I do.
We got drunk, we had raw sex and we discussed about the showrunner change in Doctor Who, in that order.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
Randomize
