I dint menn to makr ut w brtendr
Wat???
U lft me at bar, no cassh for cab, may have slept with bartender
I wish I could be a nicer person. Or a more sober one.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
Spotted: forty year old in red dress, cigarette in hand, squatting to pee by railroad tracks. Hello future.
i wonder what barack obama's brickbreaker high score is...
just heard a swedish guy suck in helium and speak in his accent. top 5 favorite moments. ever.
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I feel as though the word "tired" has become synonymous with "too high to manage the stairs" lately
it was either a cry for help or you were gargling vodka. we didnt care either way.
I feel like every picture I upload of him on facebook where you can see his purity ring, I should make the caption "something in this picture does not belong"
This american gymnastics guy.... He just messed up. I feel so bad. I just wanna hug him until he stops crying. Not even in a sexual way. I just wanna hug him.
Sad Megan is Sad
Have you been drinking my beer?
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
I just got dropped off by that cop that pulled you over. Best sex ever! Consider that $140 ticket my birthday present.
I realize that my conversation topics seem to only be about bees and my cross dressing fiance. Thank you for being my friend.
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