I told him it was like a man's penis, but smaller.
Making pb&j crepes. Using corn tortillas. So high. I don't know if I'm offending French people or Mexican people more.
The foreigner finally woke up and the first thing he did was look up a map of the u.s. His destination is to pennsylvania.
I literally just wrote "I'm sorry" in my blue book, got up and walked out
all i remember is him tryin to explain to the girls how to effectively hit the strip club with their bfs
hes actually pretty persuasive when he drinks
Made dad pull of the highway twice on the way home so I could puke. Yeah i'd say we ended the semester well.
U thinks that's bad? He told me that he had to envision high school wrestling in order to bust a nut with some girl
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I have aggressive nipples.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
How many hotdogs are you going to eat today?
THE LIMIT DOES NOT EXIST.
it's the international house of making me almost fucking shit myself
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
ya figured it'd be nice to explore the mythical world of sober sex i've heard so much about
i've often wondered how it works
Randomize
