only you would photoshop your dick
She recited Pi throughout ever orgasm she had....she said it was a game she likes to play...how far she gets is how she judges her lovers...I am oddly turned on by this...
First day of class and I'm in a bar drinking pitcher #3. Foreshadowing?
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
Well at least I still have a burrito in my pocket.
My wife managed to convince me to not drink everclear by threatening to ban me from her vagina
I'll be honest, I too would punch the 21 year old version of myself in the face, and then have rough sex with him.
I HATE HIM SO MUCH I HOPE HE GETS IN SOME WEIRD ACCIDENT WHICH MAKES IT IMPOSSIBLE FOR HIM TO NUT
Well, I can't remember Thursday and my left ass cheek hurts like hell, I'm guessing Mike's bachelor party was a success.
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Is it weird that I have your number saved in my phone as baby Jesus?
I need a rain check on breakfast. A frat boy said it was his dream to sleep with a MILF, I made his dream come true and he made me cum
There is no way I’m wasting 21 year old morning wood
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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