3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
I just asked the contractor building my house what it would cost to put a garbage disposal in all the shower drains...there was a lot of judging going on.
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
Woke up today to the sound of church bells. My first thought was shit the apocalypse, but then I remembered my hook up lives next to a church. This might be a rough day.
I think I'm gonna wear a bikini to our final tomorrow...just so he knows that no fucks will be given on his test
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
Bringing families together since 1987
Obviously. I'm here to let you eat things off my boobs and help you get laid.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
Yeah. I woke up in an awkward three way spoon with him and his sister. Tequila!
Just had to break it to that one guy that I can't sleep w him bc he looks identical to my brother. So how's your morning?
I really don't think my body can handle another night of drinking
Lol you talk like you have a choice
I am worried that I am gonna die before the weekend is over
The couple in the apartment next to mine are both opera singers. I’m never sure if I’m hearing them banging or doing vocal warm-ups.
I think my moral compass just broke
Randomize
