His facebook profile says he's interested in men, but i'm choosing to ignore that
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
her boobs were like sundried tomatoes..
okay im going to go eat, shower and find underwear... call if you want.... but ill be listenig to glee VERY loudly.
He walked in AS I was cumming. Now even my father knows I'm a squirter.
There should be a blender full of rum, tea, and grape jelly in the freezer. She thought it was a good idea until she blew chunks.
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
According to this USDA thing I just read, I should either get upper respiratory issues or begin to bleed from my nose and mouth.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
He had "Bad Bitches Only" tattooed above his dick. I don't know his name but I hope I find him again. I also don't feel that I lived up to the challenge.
I just sneeze out a chunk of leftover pickle I threw up last night. dont you try and tell me your day is going worse
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
She said "Im going to hug you" tried to give me a hickey then said her life sucks and started to cry.
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