I'm more concerned as to why he has a playlist entitled Dem Club Beats.
I just caught myself doing the gator chomp to my tv. I need to get laid.
so apparently i worked out for over an hour last night. drinking is the only way i will ever get anything done
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
Jesus Christ, she just started playing Enya and is humming along to it. Way, way, way too hungover to deal with her shitty taste in music
i got two bottles of merlot and sorrows to drown, you in??
Realized it was likely to be cursed, didn't want my own Johnson magically turning into some sort of fire breathing reptile and eating me
That is an interesting fear as well as image
Dude he's moving to fucking Germany now. What is it about your vagina that makes men want to flee the continent?
Idk I wanna make it till midnight but I also want tequila
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I just spent so much time grooming my landing strip and like, sex isn't even on the agenda tonight.
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
If she didn't block me, she would have known that I sneezed on her toothbrush.
Of course I fucked her, her man stole my bike when we were kids
Ur betting me $100 that I can't do ur sister?
Randomize
