allegedly i woke up at 5am sat in the dishwasher and peed
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
sorry he hasn't talked to me since the surprise salvia incident...
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
I'm just over here all sober hanging with two high people talking about how they're "free-spirited stallions."
I had a 10 minute conversation with the refrigerator, it was telling me how it likes to be opened and closed. Ecstasy, I love you.
Let's get weird.
It's 10 am...
I'm assuming that means you're not busy...
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
I moved out... There's nothing left but his childhood trophies...
You should make him a new one, you know like "you suck at relationships but thanks for trying participation award"
You just get me....like our souls are boning in the spirit world
I curse you to think about Guy Fieri whenever you have sex with your lady.
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
I JUST AGREED TO GO TO A CHILD'S BIRTHDAY PARTY AT A PLACE CALLED PUZZLE'S FUN DOME WHY DO I HATE MYSELF
Its not something you can force it it just has to happen like a rainbow or pooping
Randomize
