Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
have you seen my purse? i cant find it and my ipod is in there and that shit totally cost more than my abortion.
Wait til she sees the pic of her vag in court docs.
getting a black eye the first day of spring break really sets the tone for the rest of the week.
We just for robbed for the second time. I believe the only thing I have left to my name is my $75 dildo
pretty sure I just came the closest to throwing up in my pants that I'm ever gonna get. I'd like to thank the academy and the hangover thatt I hope actually kills me in the morning.
Just had sex in the darkroom, while a class was going on ten feet away. I finally have a good sex story.
Can you get the drug form of snow for the blizzard this weekend?
Okay. This morning the comforter was wet, you were underwearless and using a tiny blanket. What'd you do??
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
I'm just saying, if you haven't been dropped off at a Wawa at 5:30 in the morning by 3 cop cars, you're missing out
Between randomly bursting into tears and the reappearance of my lost sex drive, this break up has left me bizarrely damp.
Thanks for the reference. If your boss hires me, I'll buy you a drink.
If my boss hires you, I'm going to need it.
I guess I was telling girls last night that I was a virgin with terminal cancer again
Randomize
