small problem..I have a major exam in the morning so I might have to go to the library after the party
so no drinking for you?
don't be silly
I wish i could put a picture of my ass of my resume...that seems to be the only way i will ever get hired
He knows as soon as he hits chameleon eye status drunk, he is guaranteed to piss the bed we NEED to push him there
I just found my coat check number in my underwear.
they're like a gay fantastic four
I chased a girl up a staircase screaming because she had a cardboard cut out of James Dean which, at the time, I believed to my friend being held against his will
dude I just got a noise complaint from my apartment people for loud sexual activities. I'm framing this for sure
we did shots in class this morning as part of a presentation. WHY AM I LEAVING THIS COUNTRY?!
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
WHY IS FOOD SO DELICIOUS
BECAUSE SCIENCE
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
my entire left arm went numb
you need to get that checked to make sure you're not wired to have strokes instead of orgasms
Being in nursing school really pays off when your dealer tries to pass off naproxen as Percocet. Like I may have made a C in pharm but I aced the pain drug test
Blowing lines in the bathroom and trying to get into the mindset of someone who wants to be at work for 12 hours
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
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