Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
i have essays due online every friday...im just going to write 'im hungover' for every one
What is wrong with this kid? He'll take ecstasy but won't take dayquil?
Quick question, how many times can you get chlamydia before your vagina just gives up and falls off?
TINY HANDS NOT FOR BUTTHOLES
This is going everywhere on the internet.
I've come to the conclusion while folding laundry and watching porn that I may be dead inside.
i left because you were standing at the top of the stairs throwing shot glasses and bottles full of alcohol at me and yelling JAGERBOMBS
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Some cougar Brit said she loved me. America is bouncing back.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I don't care how hot he is. I will not strip for him to country music.
I bet I give better head than any other PTA mom.
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
No way man ... This is real life. Complete sentences and everything.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
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