nut hugger
You should just wear a sign that says "I like cheap Chinese food and anal"
I like taco bell too
Hm. I declare blue a flavor.
It's a Lindsey's Going to Jail Theme party.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I smell like fire and strippers. Successful sunday funday.
theres a kid in a leopard robe and sunglasses filling up a gas tank. i miss college
He needs to stop telling me how much he respects me. What does that even mean
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
if i actually get asked out by my dealer what could happen?
i don't know, but it probably involves bathtubs full of weed
The only thing I remember from last night is being naked in his bed if that's not summer drinking at it's finest then I don't wanna live anymore
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
Well you were listening to music and having sex really loudly. How was I supposed to know you'd hear me making rocket sounds?
That's not "anything", that's you deep throating a mozzarella stick.
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
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