dude i just made a burrito by wrapping 2 packs of scooby snacks with a fruit roll up. im so high
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
It's amazing how much better one feels once you put something in your vagina.
his mom called while we were having sex and asked if we could finish in his brothers room because her ceiling fan was about to fall on her bed
I woke up from my nap, looked out my window, and saw about bout 6 people get tasered in less than 20 seconds.....could someone please tell me what's going on.
I am planning my day around naps and lesbians.
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
By this time next year I expect us to have full time jobs that we can call out of so we can day drink on beautiful days like this. Oh, and grill.
We got way too high so we're sitting in the parking lot of the movies trying to figure out what bar to go to
It's not even 6 am and I've already told my mom to fuck herself in the face
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
YOURE ABOUT TO SEE SO MUCH UNCIRCUMCISED DICK
Like seriously, I would not be going if there wasn't pizza
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
Randomize
