apparently i started the naked brigade. and depantsed everyone who wasn't naked. her parents must hate me.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
why would she cut her hair? she needs all the distractions possible from those texas-sized gums and horse teeth.
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
My new years resolution is to be alive new years morning
Not really fighting over the same girl. He takes her out to dinner and then I come over and fuck her. We've worked out the perfect relationship.
She has never blacked out. I have tried to get her to so many times. Apparently it's a lot harder than we make it out to be.
Ummmmm okay let's be incredibly straightforward. Hi there. My bed's at half capacity this evening. How'd you like to fill it up?
Come part with me. By you sleep! No fun. Idek feelings Sorry for your life.
I just want you to know that I'm, like, 45% hard right now.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
My book, "How to Live With a Huge Penis" was delivered today. Can't wait to read it in public.
At one point I yelled "THIS IS MY PENANCE FOR EVERYTHING I'VE DONE WRONG" and started saying Hail Marys
When she tells her friend, "hey I'll be back tomorrow, just going to fuck a guy", right in front of you, you know you've got a winner.
Randomize
