Down for casual relationships, more fun than catholic missionary, bring condoms and don't get attached.
i hope thats the last time i ever see ryan's hairy ass fucking
Woke up in a different state, wearing only a bk crown. My boxers are in a tree and I think I went to the hospital last night.....
I told you not to do acid with the girl who works the late shift at 7-11
Ummmm yeah ..,.. All three girlfriends I have right now are chatting with each other at the party...... I'll see you on the other side
Last night you were talking while puking saying, "ahh the shoes and the purse, I'm gonna have to wash those"
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
I just realized my life is a timeline of drunken injuries.
You stuck a chicken finger in that stripper's clevage and said "Keep this warm for me.
surprisingly organic peanut butter is not the best chaser
all time personal low: room service guy going "You want french fries AND onion rings???"
I think I'm too tall to 69 successfully.
I think I might cry.
He broke into my house because he missed me. Then ends the relationship because I'm the needy one. Ironic much?
Your pictures have evolved a lot over the years but I think your angry dick pic phase was one of my favorites
Only you could get too drunk for taco bell. I don't know if I'm jealous or ashamed. Go to bed.
Did we go to Florida? My missing thong and DL just arrived in the mail. Return address was Tampa.
Randomize
