I am doing a scientific study and i need a brief description of the underpants you are wearing
He went through and tagged himself on my crotch in all of my facebook pics
Not hooking up w him- he has one of those L.L. Bean book bags w his initials on it
It was all fun and games until Tim shit on the end table
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
we usually just have an Easter beer hunt and never end up at church anyways
I slept with someone shorter than me. My vagina weeps.
You fool.
bro i dont care how hot she was, you try keeping it up with the amount of puppet he had in her room, it was like fucking in jeff dunham's house
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
I remember us getting kicked out of the bar, but neither of us know why. We woke up next to chicken bones on a plate with spoons, and my car has mud all over it including places where feet shouldn't be, like the speakers on the car door.
He's still short.... And probably a douchebag. But if we ever run into him downtown I fully encourage you to take him home and have "I hate you douchebag" sex and lick every inch of that disgustingly toned chest.
This band has the most fuckable violin player I have ever seen.
What the hell did you do last night?
I embarrassed myself, my family, name, and possibly my country.
we had to invent a new word for how drunk I was last night
Randomize
