East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
So, we're in the car ready to fuck and she asks about my ex. I wave at my lap and say, "bye". She asks what I'm doing. I say, "waving goodbye to my erection"
so last night my mother drunkenly told me that maybe the reason why I want to be a vet was because I was conceived doggy style.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
dude,it's memorial day.not getting wasted=you're a terrorist
all i wanted to do was something grown up. like go to applebees and drink.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
Given he decided my interview was a date, showed up drunk and insisted on carrying me everywhere, we weren't off to a good start.
He accidentally opened the car door during sex and all the lights came on. Needless to say, that kid passing by who was walking his dog got scarred for life.
There's no way I'm ready for marriage. I have too many pics of other guys' junk on my phone for an eternal commitment right now.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
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