Got separated, got a half bj, got dropped off in random part of the city, don't tell anyone
Just think about it this way, every time you work Sunday, it's another $75 and that equals another hooker when we go to Amsterdam.
I bruised my spine.. Jungle gyms were clearly not meant for sex.
I would ask what did you do but I feel like who did you do is probably more appropriate
Girl, he can't tell you not to take a bump just because you work tomorrow. You're on a wedding diet, remember?
IS SOBER OCTOBER A THING?? WTF WHO ARE THESE PEOPLE?
It was only in the sobering silence of the wilderness on the mountain, after I was too tired to talk anymore and I also didn't want to tell Julian that we were lost, that I realized how super tripped out I had been the entire time...
ON A SIMILAR NOTE MY DICK SIZE PSYCHIC SKILLS ARE SO GOOD
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
So this was during drunk golfing. She started wacking me off on the ninth hole and an old couple rolls up next to us. And Says "hey gu- oh my golly" and while my penis is in her hand I'm like "sorry you guys can play through"
Apparently I have decided there are no repercussions for my actions
Do you have feelings for this penis?
i just saw a man in the grocery, sitting on the floor, eating out of a galon sized tub of macaroni salad. We need to get on his level.
6 hours ago I jacked off a a guy for $100. I explained it away as "compensation" for gas and tolls. WHAT am I doing with my life? Quickest and easiest $100 I ever made though, haha
1 why did you tell them where i peed last night and 2 where the fuck are you
Randomize