Me. At least after what I've been through.
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
being able to look good while almost puking is a skill that takes a lot of puking to develop.
tell me why there is a bowl of oatmeal from starbucks in my purse
When you passed out on the kitchen counter she brushed and flossed your teeth, then carried/dragged you to bed. Why aren't you married?
There are 18k people at the game and I'm next to the one guy who pulls his underwear down to his ankles to piss.
Dude walks in wearing jean shorts and a graphic tshirt and goes home with an attractive female. EXPLAIN YOURSELF UNIVERSE.
YOU DON'T JUST GET TO CALL AND SAY YOU MIGHT BE DEAD, THEN NOT ANSWER!
The security deposit's gone, let's trash this motherfucker
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
I just did shots of fireball with my dad in a car wash. How's your pregaming going?
I took a pregnancy test at Pancheros a bit ago.
She's like the sister I never had that I want to bang.
He has me blocked on facebook.... so I stalked him using my cats fan page.
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