I was on top riding him and his friend walks in and watched for a minute before he realized what was going on
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
We were playing flip cup on the nice dining room table. Losing team had to shamwow the table in between rounds
Got a basket, 50 condoms, some candy, 100 plastic eggs & my bunny costume. Campus will feel my wrath in 2 weeks
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
holy fuck man...it feels like I got beat the fuck out of by death's baseball bat...chimichangas?
I just sent a bad sext to my sister. There's not even a way to damage control this, is there?
The fact that you walked around talking like Barbie and still got laid amazes me.
we went to go get waffles and then i sucked his dick in a parking lot. average tuesday.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
I added our drug dealer to the quickbooks software babe, he is listed under vendor's as an expense category... money management is such a bitch...
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
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