My little sister just found a condom in her bag i borrowed... Happy fourteenth birthday.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
On this egg donor form, it asks "In the past 5 years, have you had sex for drugs or money?" It only gives a yes or no option and no place to explain myself. What do I do?
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
This is the way my sobriety ends: Not with a bang, but with a whimper.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
Yeah well margarita Wednesday already came twice this week and it's just now Wednesday
Nothing says happy baby shower like showing up still kinda drunk from last night with an open tall boy in one hand and fries in the other.
Thanks to this cookie, I have now eaten something other than skittles today.
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
You chest bumped everyone we walked by on the way home... Even girls
Security has videotape of her blowing the boss against his car. Don't they know he entire parking lot is under video surveillance?
Did you survive the Atlanta roadway snowpocalypse?
All the bars are closed. Might as well be dead.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Randomize
