That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
i can't watch a movie tonight dude, im smoking weed
you smoke with your eyes?
My dad just told me if I'm going to smoke pot, to make sure I use a clean needle. WTF?
I should hang a sign above my bed that says "get hard or go home."
she told me if people cross their eyes and look at her, they say she looks like megan fox
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
It's official drugs can't kill me
All I remember is this kid kept saying that he has a dream that white kids and black kids can take shots together as one, and just we'd keep drinking to that.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
the scent of your tears make me crave pizza
It's his sex noise. "I'm gonna cu-THE LORD IS MY SHEPARD AND I SHALL NOT WANT"
He jizzed all over my ID badge. HR is gonna be pissed...
She said she is going to be sex-slave version of Princess Leia for halloween. You think there is any way I could pull off an attractive Jabba suit?
I can't get the smell of burned penis out of the house
I know her cup size but not her name....
Randomize
