Henry's handball, Tiger Wood's Car Crash, Roger Federer losing ... That's it....I'm throwing my Gillete away
Wow, So this kid just walked into class, yak'd on his lab partner then runs out. Class is now cancelled. I gotta find this kid and Thank him.
I've decided to tape numbers to the bottom of my heels corresponding to the number of drinks I can safely consume in them.
i yelled at him for a little and we ended up fucking in a random tennis court.
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
Turning 21 will be slightly bittersweet. Never again will I be able to get underage drunk at Disney World, now I'll only be able to get legal drunk and that just sets a whole different and sad tone for my life.
If you think for one second that I would forget Mardi Gras, you clearly don't know how much I love boobs.
I woke wondering who the hell was in my bed. Then i felt boobs and remembered Haha. Thirsty Thursday killed my liver and my homosexuality
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
with hottub sex, handcuffs, Pocahontas themed lap dances, and eating pumpkin pie off each other, I'm gonna say thanksgiving will be a success ;)
A homeless man gave him a blanket and an ambulance drove him to sarahs...
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
We used to bone, but now she's my life coach.
2:34, make a wish! I wish I wasn't on acid at Planned Parenthood. What's yours?
Amazon is not showing any promising results for penis tree toppers and I am genuinely surprised. Clearly this is a market that needs to be addressed.
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