I just got asked by a man in the alley if i would like to buy 50 dollars of meat for 20 bucks. Its been a weird day.
They sext over her pic comments. Role playing as wolves.
I took his sheets with my when I left seeing that I underestimated my period. Also grabbed a 6-pack out of the fridge because breakfast is the most important meal of the day & I don't do other peoples laundry for free.
I gave him shit for taking my sloppy seconds and when I woke up my eyebrow was gone
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
I think I used my hospital ID to cut the coke last night. I need to swab it for residue at work today.
You mowed a straight line through three yards because you were, and I fucking quote, "In the zone." I think they know.
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
That's true because who the fuck doesn't love Harry Potter and beer
my liver is dry heaving
im in DESPERATE NEED OF A COMPANION RIGHT NOW I’M MOTHER FUCKING TRIPPING SOLID GOLD BALLS
Did that sound smart? Cuz beneath the boozy exterior beats the heart of a fucking scientist.
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
Man I can't believe I took a huge dump in a public garden
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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