If I sit on the seam of my jeans just the right way when the bass hits, this might be my new favorite band.
How do you get eyebrow wax out of your butthole region?
The fact that you aren't ashamed to ask that is the reason I will give you the answer. Under the sink there is a bottle of wax remover. Throw my waxing kit away as well.
I just had my first experience getting hit on by a guy. It was really awkward, he touched my chest and invited me to a gay bar because "women get drunk and let their guard down at gay bars"
thats actually pretty good logic
he just told me he'd rather go to the pirates game. i know it was desperate but i said id give him roadhead if he let me come along.
These headphones make me feel like I'm sitting on John Mayers lap and he's singing just to me. I picture like a pitch black room with a single spotlight on us. Also, convinced Kyle to give me percocet soo.
Can you explain to me why I woke up with my hands tied to the hotel bed with the phone cord???
that girl from work that wants to bone me just said 'the last time i went this long without sex was in jail'. sup, red flag
Please high five our old drug dealer for me please.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Smooth sack
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
I found a blow up pig at an adult store. He will have to fuck that on video if he wants anal. Also, I bought a pair of clear high heels. Tell your brother I love him.
there may have been a blood oath never to speak of it again...only reason i can think of as to why there was a 1 inch bloody cut on my right boob
Plus we had to have sex before the game because there is a good chance we won’t be speaking for the rest of the week. #ironbowl
Pride log, day two. Noticing more bruises and scrapes. Liver functions probably very lowered.
It’s a 10 inch dick! Of course I’m getting a Brazilian
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