We're so high we're finding things in the room to build a submarine with. So far we have two cardboard boxes, a piece of wood, puffy paint, and an empty bottle to use as a periscope.
I really hope I'm not the first person who's had to wash vomit off of cash and credit cards.
Last night you tried to pee on my bed...in the hallway...your room...and the showers. When I finally got you on the toilet you passed out.
Best. Four. Twenty. Ever.
I can't wait to see you, I've been doing mouth stretches for the past 2 days
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
we woke up to him feeding us cheetos at 3am. and by feeding i mean shoving them in our mouths and saying "i mean who doesn't like cheetos"
not the best booty call
did she squirt?
only if tears count
Made myself shower before I'd masturbate. I probably should have wined and dined myself too, but that's pushing it too far.
James this is colleen. This is my new number. You just texted my grandma about getting cockblocked. Congratulations.
i made up my own drinking game and i took a secret shot every time someone asked me about school or my future
I went to an 8am hookup in another guys sweatpants. Who is the really player here?
I have drunkenly angered a family of raccoons. Please send help immediately.
Anytime you wish.we are doing double shots in the kitchen,and I drank a beer in the shower,so...the sooner you get here,the sooner you can get on our level.
Randomize
