We played Rock, Paper, Scissors last night to see who was the least drunk to drive.
The Rock won.
I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
tfor prom could you pick me up wo bottles of champagne and a condom, please?
Is it really that bad? I heard it was like pooping. I like pooping.
Last night my friend tried to make out with me in an olive garden. Ahahah
Nothing says 'I love you' like never ending salad and breadsticks
This is my last and worst hangover of the decade...I almost cherrish it
So I realized I'm not completely sober when the automatic toilet flushed and I screamed
I started drinking at around 8.. Started heavily drinking around 815.
she says she's going to shake me awake in 15min intervals if I pass out
this was your mom?
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Denis dont give a fuck, Denis drinks out of straws. Denis disregards the fire station & bought 18 fire hoses so he can fight it himself if the farmhouse is on fire.
I asked what you thought of her and you replied not the biggest I have had
Just woke up. Naked. Under an animal pelt. With a girl. I've never met her. She's pretty naked too.
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
Fast is cars. Home is I now. Drunk yoda me is.
Randomize
