He's marrying her, which means that she is his most important person in the world, so you gotta deal with it...okay?
never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Some creeps at the festival started talking to me, so I told them I was going change my tampon. Worked like a charm.
She threw up in my garbage can last night and walked home with it this morning so she could clean it out...
She is dropping it off on the way to the bar at 7.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
You've gotta make sure the carpets match the drapes, though.
I am not dying my bush blue.
Your father is wrapped in a table cloth singing, "America Fuck Yeah!" You are missing the time of your life.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
Is it totally terrible that I just signed up for classes and already found the guy I'm going to bang??
just walked passed a black light...apparently he DID cum.
Party bus got out of hand. Some guy pissed himself. Later, he couldn't find his house keys, so he kicked the back door in.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
He also sent me nipple clamps because romance is NOT dead
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