Whats up?
Drunk as a mother trucker with panties on her thumbnail..laying thee down
Stay up. I'm coming home in a little
Ill try..hurry!!!! Thine hour awaits you
I plan on using my big titties for evil tonight.
Soooo billy mays was on coke. I'm about as shocked as I was when Clay Aiken came out
I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
thursday was literally the first time i didnt drunk eat since the bush administration and it was only because i was fucking someones boyfriend. making a mental note to do that more often.
What's the point of having 3 fuck buddies when their periods all seem to sync up
He is passed out on the kitchen floor. He will fight you if you disturb him. Just a warning.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
I had fun watching you interact with the world around you. Like a fuckin 8 year old kid who just discovered build a bear but really wants a cigarette.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
Come over. We have tacos... And girls who took their clothes off. But mainly, tacos.
He lit a candle for the mood and ended up lighting my hair on fire while we were hooking up...moodkiller
I walked in on my sister eating my leftover burrito naked. How could my night have gotten any worse?
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
I just thought I should tell you that I always know what you are doing. Everywhere. Every time. -Your loving Mother
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