sometimes I think that if I just met him. he would have a crazy realization and fall madly in love with me. what do you say? I'm not just another fan.
Holy fuck. She looks like Vin Diesel's stuntman
There's a walmart bag of my vomit outside my front door. I just really need someone to appreciate that with me.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
watching law and order svu marathons. all of the sex crimes cases start like my sat night.
It took 5 minutes to find my bra.. in his car.
He yelled out my full name in bed...I felt like I was being scolded.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
Nothing like an old fashioned, wine fueled, anxiety-cry in the shower to start off finals week.
It's 6 a.m. ... what the hell.
I hope they realize that to me "collecting their mail" is synonymous with "fucking in every room in their house, and twice in the party shower."
I just picked up a hitchhiker so karma will be on our side this weekend. Hahahahahaha
No.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
It's a long story, but I accidentally peed on my dog. I'll tell you about it tomorrow, and we shall never tell my wife.
Like I didn't gracefully walk into these feelings. No, I fucking stumbled and fell face fucking first.
Nothing cures your heart after a boy calling you unattractive than a big fat dick
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