I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
Court Ordered Rehab!!! Do you think I'll need a swimsuit?
he was uncircumcised...I HAVE NOT YET REACHED THAT SKILL LEVEL OF DICK
better yet, through the bookshelves. like an intellectual glory hole
Went to the career fair today..I handed out many resumes to find out later that they say I have a bachelor o farts degree...Top that.
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
You're getting spoiled, you better send me at least a side boob pic if you wanna see my dick dressed up as Davie Crockett.
I woke up spooning with a broom that someone taped a mustache too..i need to stop starting my nights by drinking "hangover" wine.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
her tits were more amazing then brown bears with armor and guns that fire bullets of Justice that destroys inequality.
No, supporting your unemployed boyfriend IS NOT what credit cards are for.
No amount of beer will make me feel better about this. It's time for Emergency Whisky
Whoever was doing lines off my iPad is a dick. Also bring Gatorade, for I hunger
For Who flesh?
We got kicked out of yet another strip club because your mom wanted to "show these kiddies how it's done"
Randomize
