And, I saw Emily's panties. How? She doesn't sit like a lady.
so this rather large man keeps buying us drinks.......then he licked my face....i dont really care though because the drinks are good. Is this bad?
No stitches, just platelets and will power
he's washing the lighter in the sink and telling me to picture unicorns. requesting backup.
Thanks for the morning blowjob. Scientifically proven you can't have a bad day if it starts with a blowjob.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
The salesman at the smoke shop just told me my hair is glorious...
Jesus Christ I am the crazy cat lady of vibrators
You guys wanna start around 10:30 tomorrow?
We can start at 5am for all I care. You ask like I have plans.
My vibrator looks like a lipstick tube. So does my mace. I just realized the potential problems of keeping them both in the same bag.
There is a guy in class using a wine bottle as a water bottle. Welcome to the Faculty of Environment.
I have a tab of a google image search of onion rings open and it is making me so happy.
Well he has a golden retriever set as his background so there's no way he was filming us having sex
Either im seeing the northern lightgs, someone is having a rave, or im on acid.. Im most likely on acid
Watching South Park, doing sit-ups and drinking tequila. In other words, my night is going pretty good.
Randomize
