they started playing Don't Stop Believin' and you had a melt down because it wasnt the Glee version
Just walk through the Honors dorm on a Saturday night. You'll feel better about yourself.
she called me a fuckfaceshitdick. not that's creative. it sounds like a crayola crayon, preferrably an orange-brown shade.
I might never shower again without beer.. I might also always drink naked
I can't tell you what you just drank, that would ruin the point of Mystery Monday.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
I'm driving while wearing hulk hands
You did it first. I was merely expressing my support for you, by pressing my testicles against a window.
Omg. I wanna lecture the drug dealer about how highschool should not be his glory days.
Will keep you updated on the sexual orientation of my new guy
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
all I know is id definitely throw up if you guys ever dated so if you do stay the fuck away from me
Come on in. I'm butt naked, in the kitchen, eating ice pops
Also we're getting drunk and sledding down Caroline street. See you soon.
Is it acceptable to respond to a declaration of love with 'and I love your dick'? Asking for a friend who shares a name and possibly a phone number with me. Entirely coincidental.
Randomize
