just ate pastrami before passing out in my hotel room. My room smells like a petting zoo
how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
I ran out of diet so I'm mixing captain with a juice box. Being a mom has finally paid off.
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
Found a barbie with nipples. Life is complete.
No. I didn't know. I thought mid afternoon shots meant the day could only get better.
I just ate a bag of doritos while taking a shower. I can now officially do anything
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
We were on the ground in Tampa for 55 hours and we drank for 30 of them.
We won Spring Training 2013.
Not a or good or bad impression, just that you were all basically naked playing beer bong in sombreros and ties. Casual.
you must be at least a level 5 friend to unlock my sexual orientation
Hypothetically - think of it as Schrodinger's blow-job.
is it just me or does "lol" kill any sort of vibe while sexting?
Quit being awkward towards me every time the group is together. They're going to figure out we're fucking.
Randomize
