I want to see a picture of the girl worth ruining our relationship for
summer is not the time to consider going full bush.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
you insisted on breathalizing me with a inhaler.
i bought a pregnancy test with dimes. Is that trashy?
they are using this drunk girl like a spin the bottle in the hot tub, whoever she lands on she makes out with.
She said she wanted to have closure sex.
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
I have already decided that it happened in an alternate universe since both of the people involved don't remember it and we only have the word of a sober person that it happened at all
Casually brushing the Bacardi out of my hair. It's a good time to ponder regretting everything that happened last night.
Right now you and beer are my only friends.
My liver needs me to go back to work asap.
Money making scheme, blow job proof mascara. Waterproof is bullshit
I wanna stuff your vagina full of Reese's peanut butter hearts and eat you clean
i have pictures frm only 4 hours ago that will fucking ruin you so i suggest yuo come get me.
Where are you?
dunno. ask mike. bring pain killers. and underwear. and my dignity.
Randomize
