My penis looks like a roll of pennies
Oh. Ok. I get the hint.
Like a roll of pennies where the paper got wet & then dried all wrinkly and weird...
i might even pee on it at walmart i am so nervous
i wish i could just hire someone to go down on me every night until i fall asleep
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
She's Christian and monogamous. Two wammies right there. No amount of convincing will turn that bi for a night.
there's a sledge hammer in the bottom of the swimming pool... so whatever happened last night was probably awesome
They were going around the house breaking things and screaming "Not my house!"
Um...celebrating is an understatement. You flashed the guy at the mexican restaurant and then screamed, "It's just my bikini, I swear!"
Please ignore everything I told you about my girlfriends vagina last night.
I accidentally walked in the wrong house but I somehow left with a chicken leg. Good fucking night.
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
Just had a med school interview with that doctor I fucked in college. He remembered. Asked if I still have my nipple rings. Overall, I think it went well.
You just had sex during the movie Radio. This is an all time low
As long as there is beach, drink, dick, in that order. I’m in.
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