So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Come put a leash on your gf. She just challenged 8 cops to a wrestling match for 'tag team champion of the world'
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
New major. Tourism Management. I dont know what it is but it sounds like something all the stupid slutty failed business management majors do.
I somehow ended up with a bottle of red wine in one hand and white in the other and would drink them at the same time. Ruined
Well, I had a dudes gf walk in on us the next morning but nothing during...She shook my hand after I got dressed and said "nice to meet you with your clothes on" best moment of my life.
Dude, he's legal now. You could not pry me from his dick with the jaws of life.
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
She went outside in nothing but her panties and came back inside 15 minutes later wearing a different pair of panties.
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
I showed my cat the amount of coke I had. She looked concerned.
I'm pretty happy on the couch eating Popeyes and watching Cops so if I go over there you better have drugs left
She told me I’m a “stunt cock.” I’m okay with that
Randomize