remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
I feel like I was just dunked in a tub of beer and then thrown in a giant dryer with rocks in it.
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
Woke up this morning in a randoms bed clutching an airplane ticket. God I hope I'm still in the country
Dude, didn't you know? Its balls out wednesday.
How do I know I'm high? Let me count the ways.
1. I put the milk in the cupboard, 2. Everything tastes fucking amazing, 3. My dog is really soft, 4. The lunesta butterfly flew out of my tv and touched me
I like to think I'd be good at dodging genitalia.
Just walked into the library with a case of Strawberitas in hand.. no one said a word.. I think they were just impressed I knew where the library was
Do you remember lying across two tables saying 'go away I'm trying to pull' to me, Sollie and Sean?
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
Over 14,000 people at my school and the kid I went home with last night is IN MY FUCKING LECTURE
So you're saying that I ended up challenging a dude to Uno then proceed to punch them in the face?
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Randomize
