We are brilliant. We call it the pint walk. Killing a pint of vodka while we walk from cleveland park to dupont. just making mama proud
Can I use cash for clunkers to trade in her boobs for a new set of 18 year old tits?
Its worth a shot.
i just heard her through the wall saying "not on my face! NOT on my face!" then a scream and "I SAID NOT ON MY FACE!!!"...nice work dude.
He passed out mid-signature
What hospital were we in last night? Insurance needs to know
My mouth already tastes like senor cuervo took a piss in it and it's barely 1 am
i preemptively threaten to cock slap your kids if they are snobby yuppy bitches
This guy just told me he wanted to bathe in bong water with me and then tried to lick my nipple through my bra. This could be love.
Everything sucks i just wanna cry and smoke a bowl and pet my cat and die. All at the same time
I'm beginning to think the only reason I get laid anymore is girls are fantasizing sleeping with my dad...
Let's just say after this weekend I'm known as Shameous the Irish bar fighter.
Hypothetical question. Say I was bleeding profusely, close to your house, and needed a place to go to clean up and perform minor surgery on myself. Like now.
you can't just say no to brian. he was bugging me to get me to drunk for 14 hours straight yesterday. HE DOESN'T GIVE UP
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I recall trading my iPhone watch for a carton of Marlboros.
Randomize
