I shampoo & condition my pubes, sometimes i wish my face was closer so i could rub against it cause it feels like plush
My sis friend said it was fake then described it as "scary"...greatest adj ever applied to my dick
don't worry. When rigor sets in, we'll make sure to get you laid one last time.
you know i think I know why you are single...because you are real cute but then you open your mouth and let words come out and all goes to hell.
I'm not 100% sure, but I think someone gave me a bath last night...
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
My wife googled 'purchase vibrator.' Not sure if I should be excited or offended.
Does she know that uploading nude photos to photobucket and networking are two different things? You may want to ask.
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
No. I do not want to discuss your lesbian tendencies with my sister.
She still started it.
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
One time she showed me her pierced nipples in our high school locker room and now she has a daughter
I’d feel the same about religion. We can talk about it, but I want you to go down on me first
I’m pretty sure I have teeth marks on my neck
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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