Can't talk. I'm at the Tulsa Sheriff's office with a bunch of rednecks. I bet I'm the only one that voted for Obama.
I bet you're the only one who could read the ballott.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
This chick just checked into her walk of shame on Foursquare... I think I'm in love.
How many ice cream sandwiches is an acceptable meal replacement?
2.5
He was on Keeping Up with the Kardashians it was like a deed from god to bang him
im still trying to figure out who put the honey mustard in the blender then put the entire blender into the freezer
She just lifted up her dress, screamed "This is gonna be a good one!" And pissed on the pole...
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
She is so graceful and lady-like, like a swan... On meth
They were so huge my eyes were just drawn to them. Boob gravity man.
I just can't do Wednesdays sober anymore
He got an erection from helping me mobilize my lumbar spine. I love physical therapy school.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
My head is bruised from having sex in the backseat of an explorer last night.
Stop inviting Kevin over. The dickless wonder started playing some strange Sci-FY music and speaking an alien language and the girls split.
Randomize
