It's hipsters with their motorcycle cop mustaches, moccasins, douchey irony, and department stores to supply their independent conformity
Something's gotta give!
Dibs on passing out in front of the toilet.
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
thanks for stopping by when you did. making a meatball quesadilla while high was a bad choice
We just laid there in bed together, petting his dick and repeating, "IT FEELS LIKE VELVET!!!"
I am currently watching him baptize himself in a baby pool with a handle of belvedere while wearing a coral dress.
I want to have sex with him.
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
I'm sorry but you're choosing a girl that faked a pregnancy when you wouldn't return her calls over a more attractive sane girl who you begged for a chance with last week? God you're a loser.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
Do you remember when I didn't post that pic of you fucking an avocado on your boss' desk? Can you return the favour?
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I was just tongue fucked into oblivion.
I'm too high and old for this...
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
He's got that kind of dick that just MAKES me cheat on my boyfriend. It deserves a trophy. Really you should give it ride sometime.
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