i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
in hindsight, the duct tape banana hammock was a bad idea.
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
I started making my dollar bills into rings for the strippers
and she is using the paper towels as a pillow... but you know what? i've done that too.. so u can really tell we are sisters.
You tried to call "time out" during the sobriety test.
i just keep picturing us drunk surrounded by kittens.
it went ok. then he slept in a parking lot and took me out for a picnic the next day. boys are confusing.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
it's taken me 3 hours to eat this pudding cup. I think I am melting.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
I can't figure out how to eat twizzlers and I have to be at a wedding reception in an hour.
Please never have kids.
It isn't easy. I met him at the gym. He wanted to go out he doesn't drive so I drove and he wanted Dairy Queen where his sister is the manager. This is dating in my 20's
bought a large fruitopia from McDonalds at 7:45 this morning. Spilled it on the ground. Cried. THAT hungover.
you'll kiss me after i give you a blowjob but you wont kiss me after I eat apple sauce? am I the only one who sees something wrong with this?
Randomize
