did you get engaged???
he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
i saw the 3rd guy i ever had sex with last night and kept calling him #3
it was a weeks worth of wine for $20. it would have been fiscally irresponsible to not buy it.
judging by the cake all over the hall, my neighbors had a pretty successful thursday too.
Trying to figure out if I'm the second dude she hooked up with yesterday. I feel like a consolation prize
You slow danced with your carpet steamer last night.
After we smoked, the cops questioned us but i just asked if he wanted to join our basketball team.
I have my ice chest next to my bed. Instead of breakfast in bed, its beers in bed. 10x better
they wouldn't let me take the pitcher of beer on the ferris wheel
The girl in the hotel room next to us walked out at the same time as me this morning. She just shook her head, looked at me and said, "faker." Is it that easy to tell?!??
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
I told ya. I'm super awesome at making things super awkward. I'm the Awkwardnator.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
The people around me on the bus dont know im wearing glowsticks under my clothes. I feel like a super hero.
Randomize
