You know you think of me naked too
Not since I found Jesus
i can't believe i haven't brushed my teeth. and i just kissed my grandma. I'm going to hell.
is it weird that i feel like i won the break up because my status change got two comments and his got zero?
It's been over a month and I still can't find the bra I wore out on new years eve.
all i remember was you yelling "look at my little feet" at everyone on the way home from the bar.
he's speaking broken english and calling me isaac.. this is not the australian i ordered for a one nighter
Not going to lie- I'm a little freaked out camping right now. This is one of those high activities you don't do by yourselves...or close to bears
Exact words that were just spoken as she was on her 6th, yes 6th piece of bread: "I'm only eating the soft and chewy inside of the bread-I am taking the crust home to feed my turtles"
Why is hotel staff askin about the blood in our room
Best orgasm I ever had! I though we totally connected and I asked him to stay over. He went back to the sigma chi house and returned with his blankie and a 40. please help
Because I know nothing is hotter than ocean themed dick pics on SnapChat...
I just spent the better half of my Friday night alone, naked eating McDonalds. Not my worst start of a new year
He literally just laid flat on top of me motionless at one point. It felt less like foreplay and more like he was trying to use me as a flotation device. 0/10
I'm not sure what happened last night but my dog has a red cup taped to his back with a little beer and a ping pong ball in it..
We invented a new game.
he went down on me and a few minutes later he asked to show me a magic trick. then he pulled a quarter out of my vagina
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