I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
He is such a slut. More and more my type.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
I enjoy that i have a whole shelf of clothes that I've accumulated from random sex. You know the ones you get to make the morning after look less awkward like similar to an athletes trophy shelf
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
Is it a bad thing that the only time i wear nice clothes to class, is when i get too fucked up the night before and wear the same clothes i went out in?
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
Apparently my type is "guy whose parents had unprotected sex on Halloween". Last week was my ex's, my FWB's, and the guy I'm seeing's birthdays.
Did you find any other hidden treasures in my room? Specifically weed? Or Slim Jims?
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
I just want to go home and eat bagel bites in my underwear
Lies! You took my virginity, and now my cigarettes!
Randomize
