Wow so rude I was trying to have an orgy later but whatever
I think having sex with you would be a great treat for us
you guys got to bein so kosher and go with the flow
I need hand sanitizer and jesus.
once he started yelling at me in latin, i wasn't sure what we were fighting about anymore...
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
If I had a clone, I'd fuck it with a condom
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Why is there a keg in our kitchen? I'm not complaining but why is there a keg in our kitchen?
Okay. We're coming naked. We need Saran wrap and plastic forks.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
How do I ask where the Jello shot cups are at Walmart without sounding like white trash?
If I could sit on this toilet forever I would totally do that right now
Yeah last night got weird fast. No lie, a kid pulled a butt-plug with a tail out of his ass.
Probably shouldn't be looking at memes at my grandmother's funeral
I heard Enya coming from steve’s room. I am too high to handle this sudden depth of character
ugh my stomach is so upset-- didn't get a chance to take a violent enough hangover shit at work
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